Scarlet Magazine

By Andrew J. Baran


Posted on | November 27, 2009 | No Comments

I’ve been hanging around car lots lately. Probably because I’m thinking about getting a new car. Not that the one I have is bad. Heck, it’s even paid off! Yet, I’m starting to think about another car, a different car, instead of the one I have. And how fun it’d be to bring it home and park it in my garage.

I like words. I like to write words. From experience I’ve learned people comprehend better if I compare things….like cars…to get my point across.

A friend and I were talking the other day about my sex life…or lack thereof. Now, don’t get me wrong I’m a highly sexual being. There’s just been a lot of %$#@ in my life that’s made it less than ideal according to my personal standards. To drive the point home he said, “You have the tang of a 20 year old and the street knowledge of an innocent junior high girl.” I didn’t refute him. What I might lack in experience I completely make up for in imagination and desire.

As I walked through the car lot looking at all the new models, various colors, and types I asked myself a question, “If I am a car, what am I?” The answer came to me as clear as the cloudless sky above… I’m a Camero because it’s a car so hot it turns everyone’s heads as it drives by. And I’d be painted baby blue, showcasing a hint of masculine power coupled with the soft pastel colors of femininity.

“And how would I find me – this Camero?” I ask myself. It wouldn’t be found at a dealership, no…a private owner. I’d have to search for it on or Craigslist instead. Why? Because I’d be tucked back in someone’s garage, under a tarp, kept all shiny and new. It wouldn’t have seen to many snowy days or sunny days for that matter..only taken for a joy ride now and then. Yes, this 1976 Camero might have been older than what I was looking for but then it definitely had low miles.

And if I took it for a test drive I know what I’d find. A car that would say back to me. “I’ve been waiting all these years to show someone what I can do. I want to have fun. I want to feel the spontaneity of the open road. I want to drive fast! I want to drive slow. And I want the right hands behind the wheel to experience it with.”



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